terms of service
effective immediately, retroactively, and not especially enforceably
acceptance of terms
By continuing to view this page, you agree to nothing, because nothing was ever offered. This is less a legal agreement than a mutual understanding that you scrolled this far.
description of service
This service is a personal website. It provides no service. Any resemblance to a functioning product is coincidental and will be addressed in a future update that also does not happen.
uptime and availability
Best effort. "Best effort" has not been independently verified, audited, or in most cases, attempted.
user conduct
You may use this site for any lawful purpose, though it's unclear what purpose it currently serves for anyone, lawful or otherwise.
limitation of liability
We are not liable for anything, including this sentence, the previous sentence, or any decisions made after reading either.
governing law
These terms are governed by whichever jurisdiction is least likely to ever read them.
changes to these terms
These terms may change at any time, for no reason, without notice, consistent with how everything else on this site gets decided.